Ten Things You Will (probably) Never Hear In My Yoga Class

Who doesn’t love a Top Ten List?  Inspired by others, but uniquely my own…

1.    “I’ve changed my name to Satya. Don’t ever call me Tracie again or I will karmically destroy you.”

2.    “I will be taking the next year off to sleep with study at the feet of my guru in a cave in Rishikesh. Because I’m just that spiritual. And I really need a break from my kids.”

3.   “Flower your buttocks to the sky!”

4.   “Could someone please turn down the heat?”

5.    “For the next ten minutes, all you goddesses…free-form interpretive dance!”

6.   “My sense of smell is so exquisitely tuned I can detect if you’ve eaten meat by the smell of your sweat. Or if you regularly enjoy single malt scotch.”

7.    “If you’re not keeping up, then you pretty much suck.”

8.    “Eat, Pray, Love” was the story of my life.”

9.   “Lock your knee! Lock your knee! Lock your knee!”

10.  “My newest playlist is inspired by the soundtrack of Mama Mia, with a little Coldplay thrown in for good measure.”

One thought on “Ten Things You Will (probably) Never Hear In My Yoga Class

  1. Eat, Pray, Love is the story of my life too. Except not the pray or love part. Just the eat. LOL! Great post!

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